What Disney Characters Will Never Say

[disneyphilip]

Tssk.

You do know that cursing is not allowed on this forum, right?

[thedisneyspirit]

You do know that cursing is not allowed on this forum, right?

Edited. Seriously, dude, don't get your panties in a twist.

[Big Disney Fan]

PINOCCHIO: (after being made a real boy) How about making me a girlfriend, father?

That line actually was heard in the 1996 Pinocchio movie with Jonathan Taylor Thomas, though it was made by New Line Cinema, not Disney.

[thedisneyspirit]

Wow! Jasmine's a gold-digger! Or at least a jewel-digger.

Minnie- Oh, Goofy is the sexiest man I've ever met. F*** Mickey, I want to marry Goofy!

Ironically, Goofy had the hots for her in "Ye Olden Days", though she did not, in return. This led to a duel between Mickey and Goofy for her heart.

1- Yep, funny, in one Popeye short that they parodied Aladdin (with Olive Oil as the princess), she totally fell for Popeye once he showered her in diamonds. That's chick's all "Gotta have that nice stuff."

2- Yes, that cartoon is cute. Also, it kinda references how often you see Goofy and Minnie in the parks together. she's totally cheating on Mickey

[disneyphilip]

BABY HERMAN: Not the mama! Not the mama!

[Big Disney Fan]

2- Yes, that cartoon is cute. Also, it kinda references how often you see Goofy and Minnie in the parks together. she's totally cheating on Mickey

Especially considering that, at WDW's Magic Kingdom, they, but not Mickey, can be found at Pete's Silly Sideshow, while Mickey is at the Town Square Theater, way down at the other end of the park!

[Big Disney Fan]

I'm not sure if it was brought up before, but here's something I found from DisneyLies.com:

JUNGLE CRUISE SKIPPER: (as the boat passes by the Indiana Jones ride) Across the way is the mysterious Temple of the Forbidden Eye. I'll bet that's what you thought you were standing in line for, wasn't it? Ha! Suckers!

[thedisneyspirit]

2- Yes, that cartoon is cute. Also, it kinda references how often you see Goofy and Minnie in the parks together. she's totally cheating on Mickey

Especially considering that, at WDW's Magic Kingdom, they, but not Mickey, can be found at Pete's Silly Sideshow, while Mickey is at the Town Square Theater, way down at the other end of the park!

See what I told ya? Mickey's blind at these things.

[Jay]

Pocahontas- I think a Dunkin Donuts would look wonderful in this forest.

Aurora- No I'm not going to pick berries today I picked them yesterday! Can't you see my hands are still stained from the berry juice! Why can't I eat anything other than berries?!?! I was reading a Teen Beat magazine and Guinevere was eating a cheese burger in one photo. It looks delicious I want to try one! You guys just don't understand I'm sixteen and I have needs. i want to wear make up and date boys and wear revealing clothing and have real friends I can't talk to about boys and junk! I want to eat unhealthy foods and then look in the mirror and cry that I am fat! Can't you understand this!?!?!?


Cruella- Anita dahling! I just love your house it's the cutest little thing! Dahling the wallpaper you chose is fabulous I wish I could have your style and eye for decorating! Oh where is Roger dear? He is such a sweetheart we chatted on the phone for a full hour the other night. He is quite a charming man Anita. A very charming man indeed.

[Dominicboo]

Hello! My name is Dominic!
Gothel:Rapunzel darling you are far too shy. You are leaving this tower,and meeting some new friends!
Frollo:Quasimodo it's what inside that counts...there are far more good people than bad
Maleficent:Oh no thanks...can't come to the party, but I'll send your baby a gift card!

[Jules]

Hello Dominic! Where are you from?

Maleficent: Oh no thanks...can't come to the party, but I'll send your baby a gift card!

Good one!

[Dominicboo]

Hello Dominic! Where are you from?

Maleficent: Oh no thanks...can't come to the party, but I'll send your baby a gift card!

Good one!

I live in New Jersey! Thanks!
More villain ones since these are the most fun
Gaston:I'm not so great........why would Belle choose me?
Lotso:Go back to your kid Woody....and please take me with you so I can experience this joy firsthand and rectify my many wrongs.
Queen of Hearts:Do you think I suffer from mood swings?
Charles Muntz:(looking for Kevin)THAR SHE BLOWS!

[Big Disney Fan]

More villain ones since these are the most fun
Gaston:I'm not so great........why would Belle choose me?
Lotso:Go back to your kid Woody....and please take me with you so I can experience this joy firsthand and rectify my many wrongs.
Queen of Hearts:Do you think I suffer from mood swings?
Charles Muntz:(looking for Kevin)THAR SHE BLOWS!

CAPTAIN HOOK: What's all this fighting between me and Pan getting us? Why don't we settle our differences in a civil way over tea and cookies.

[thedisneyspirit]

More!!!

Jasmine: Hmm Jafar certainly's got one twisted....

Abu: Princess! Not in front of the kids!

Tigger: Bah, bouncing is for losers. I better go eat some honey or something...

Kanga: OMG ROO I CAN'T STAND YOU ANYMORE! Go live with your Uncle Rabbit or something, I QUIT! I'm gonna go and live with Tigger, ok? Bye!

Pooh: The freedom of choice is bestowed upon us by birth, in which we...

Goofy: Woof

[thedisneyspirit]

More!

Cinderella: Hmm I love the scent of soap in the evening...

Elsa- For now I'll try defying gravity!- Shit, wrong musical

Eilonwy- I swear the next person that confuses me with Alice WILL DIE

Tiana- Sometimes I feel like I was part of a political agenda.

Merida- Hiccup I love you.

Bianca- More kidnapped children? Oh no, please. I'm tired of always getting these second-rate missions!

Cheshire Cat- You're in my dream now, bitch! (ANOES reference)

Snow White- Today we'll cook a meat pie, mr. Deer, would you be so kind to help me?

Mickey- Bugs Bunny can blow it

Aurora- Oh, I've met him before, once upon a dream, only he had claws for fingers and he tried to kill me. *sighs* It was so romantic.

Hans- Oh Anna, tbh I don't care about you, or Arendelle, or anything. I just want to eat sandwiches.

[Big Disney Fan]

More!!!

Jasmine: Hmm Jafar certainly's got one twisted....

Abu: Princess! Not in front of the kids!

JASMINE: Oh, sorry.

Goofy: Woof

PLUTO: Gawrsh!

[Kraken Guard]

Eilonwy- I swear the next person that confuses me with Alice WILL DIE

... Considering how obscure the movie is, it wouldn't really come as a surprise.

Vanellope Von Shweetz: ... Ya' know Ralph, Racing wasn't really all that thrilling.

King Candy: The glitch! The coin she uthed to buy her way into the race! That wath your medal!? Alright, well... Lemme go in and fetch it back for ya'.

... King Candy, things would have turned out a LOT better for you if you went that route.

[Big Disney Fan]

Eilonwy- I swear the next person that confuses me with Alice WILL DIE

... Considering how obscure the movie is, it wouldn't really come as a surprise.

You know, it's funny: when I first saw that movie and Eilonwy first appeared, the way she said to Taran, "Oh, is that you?" sounded almost exactly like Alice when she said to the Caterpillar (in reference to keeping her temper), "Is that all?"

[Semaj]

Dumbo: "Can I have some more vodka please?" =3

Wendy Darling: "I can't WAIT til I'm old enough to leave this smelly nursery!"

Pongo: "Pups for sale! Get your pups for sale!"

Merlin: "I can't teach this kid. He's too stupid!"

Eilonwy: "Why do people keep bugging me? I get WAY too much attention." >_<

Ariel: "I'm getting my hair shaved and dying it blonde."

Lilo: "Sorry, not an Elvis fan."

Queen Elsa: "I hate the snow, I hate the snow, I hate the rain and I hate the sleet..."

[Jules]

Merlin: "I can't teach this kid. He's too stupid!"

I always thought Wart never seemed particularly bright in the film.