What Disney Characters Will Never Say

[Kraken Guard]

The Horned King: No one loves meeeeeeeee..


Out of Character sounding. But with how his reputation is, you never know..


Jolly Roger: Don't worry, Jack Sparrow. It was inevitable that you would be the one to become Pirate Lord. No hard feelings, right?

Thought the Horned King was obscure? You would have to be familiar with Pirates of the Caribbean Online to know Jolly Roger.


Maleficent: I wish I could have taken back the curse I placed on Aurora..

Chernabog: Let there be LIGHT!

Maestro Forte: I miss being human..

^ Mr. "Humanity is over-rated"..

[Big Disney Fan]

HORNED KING: (to Taran) Taran... I am your father!

[Big Disney Fan]

CANDACE: (seeing Phineas and Ferb do that mini-show at DCA) Mom! Phineas and Ferb are doing a dance party at the California Adventure!

[Semaj]

Lampwick: "I want to go to school!"

Flower: "It's not a bad word, kids. I'm a SKUNK!"

Cinderella: "I hate meeces to pieces!"

Mad Hatter: "No tea, please. I prefer coffee."

Tigger: "I HATE bouncing!"

Gatson: "Chuck Norris is better."

Kuzco: "I actually wanted to be an eagle..."

[Big Disney Fan]

Here are some Disney theme park ones:

SMALL WORLD DOLLS: Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me!

PIRATES: It's a small world after all!

COUNTRY BEARS:
In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room,
In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room,
All the birds sing words and the flowers croon,
In the tiki tiki tiki tiki tiki room.

TIKI BIRDS:
The bear band bears will play now
In the good ol' key of G;
Zeke and Zeb and Ted and Fred
And a bear named Tennessee.

GHOSTS: Grim grinning ghosts, come out to socialize!
(The song stops)
THURL RAVENSCROFT BUST TO OTHER BUSTS: Thank goodness we're singing the right song!

[thelittleursula]

Rapunzel " I don't go outside and see the world, saying inside with Gothel is just fine and dandy ".

Alice " I enjoy reality, making up a creative fantasy world is just stupid "!

Cinderella " Screw you Prince Charming " ! " I want to stay at home and be a slave and work for my stepmother and stepsisters " !

Mickey Mouse " I don't love Minnie Mouse, I love Pete instead. I like them tubby " xp

Peter Pan " I want to be 45 years old and read the newspaper and pay the bills while smoking a pipe; being a adult would be so awesome " !!

Sleeping Beauty " Ha ha ! I can't go to sleep because I've had 600 cups of Coffee ! " " I'll defeat you Maleficent by bouncing off the walls like a lunatic " !

Pluto " Hi Mickey , yeah I just spoke " !

[Jules]

Mickey (to Donald): "Tu sei un stronzo!"

[Big Disney Fan]

Mickey (to Donald): "Tu sei un stronzo!"

Whoa, that's harsh!

[Big Disney Fan]

(Geppetto has been swallowed by Monstro and Pinocchio is trying to find him)
PINOCCHIO: (looking at sea creatures) Maybe they speak whale... (slowly and deeply, trying to sound like a whale) Weeee neeeed...
JIMINY CRICKET: Pinocchio?
PINOCCHIO: ...tooo fiiind Mooooonssstrooo.
JIMINY: What are you doing? Are you sure you can speak whale?
PINOCCHIO: Caaaan yoooou teeeellll uuuuss wheeeerrre toooo fiiiind hiiiiim?
JIMINY: Pinoke! Heaven knows what you're saying!
(sea creatures swim away at the mention of Monstro)
PINOCCHIO: Gee, they're scared.
JIMINY: (sarcastically) No kidding!

[disneyphilip]

SEAGULLS FROM "FINDING NEMO": Yours! Yours! Yours! (as opposed to "Mine! Mine! Mine!")

DOPEY: "Hi. My name is Dopey. What's yours? It's great to meet ya."

JOSE CARIOCA: "I quit!" (takes cigar out of his mouth and throws it away)

BRER FOX: "Ya know, Brer Bear, we'll never get to have Brer Rabbit over for dinner. Let's just order a pizza instead."

CHI FU: "I take back everything single mean thing I ever said about you, Mulan. From now on, I will have nothing but the utmost respect for women and never be a chauvanist pig ever again."

QUEEN CLARION: "Silence! Infidel! You infect my world with your presence!"



Note: That last one is an inside joke referring to another Disney role Anjelica Huston played.

[Jules]

Wreck-It Ralph: Hi, Gene ... you're looking dashing today. Oh ... fiddlesticks, where oh where did I put my mascara?

(rummages in handbag)

[Kraken Guard]

King Candy/Turbo: Modth, racing ith tho boring nowadayth. -_-

... Even though Wreck-It Ralph has been out for how-long, people might already know that secret identity, but spoilers!

[Jules]

King Candy/Turbo: Modth, racing ith tho boring nowadayth. -_-

Shouldn't "racing" be "rathing"? You made a thilly mithtake. Tho there!

[Big Disney Fan]

QUEEN CLARION: "Silence! Infidel! You infect my world with your presence!"



Note: That last one is an inside joke referring to another Disney role Anjelica Huston played.

QUEEN CLARION: "Silence! I keel you!"

[Kraken Guard]

King Candy/Turbo: Modth, racing ith tho boring nowadayth. -_-

Shouldn't "racing" be "rathing"? You made a thilly mithtake. Tho there!

Hoho~ I thought ath much! Thilly me! Thilly me!

[Jules]

Hoho~ I thought ath much! Thilly me! Thilly me!

The thellth theathellth by the theathore.
The thellth the thellth are thurely theathellth.
Tho if the thellth thellth on the theathore,
I'm thure the thellth theathore thellth.

[Kraken Guard]

King Candy/Turbo: "... Ya' know, speaking with a lisp can get really hard at times; I think I'm gonna take a break from it all."


Funny story: I've roleplayed as the Horned King for a few years, and I've only started writing as Turbo as well.
Sometimes... That lisp will occasionally sneak its way into the Horned King's dialog.

[Big Disney Fan]

King Candy/Turbo: "... Ya' know, speaking with a lisp can get really hard at times; I think I'm gonna take a break from it all."

Not quite...

King Candy/Turbo: "Thufferin' thuccotash!"

Okay, now it's time for his break.

[thedisneyspirit]

Tssk.

Jasmine- OMG Prince Achmed is so ****ing hot I get wet thinking of him. Can't wait to marry him and get all his jewels.

Yzma- Maybe I can just settle working on that ***py fast food place, I mean who the #*#@ cares about being an Empress?

Kuzco- Yay I'm a llama! I always wanted to be one!

Goofy- I find the current situation in which I am the subject of ridiculous matters and the laughing stock of the family to be incredibly insulting. Also, I need a whore.

Max- When I grow up I wanna be just like my dad!

Rapunzel- You're such an ***hole Flynn! *kills him* (hmm, I may like her if she acted this way... )

Minnie- Oh, Goofy is the sexiest man I've ever met. F*** Mickey, I want to marry Goofy!

Panchito- Today we're gonna eat Sushi!

Jose- The *##*? I'm never smoking that *BEEP* again! *throws cigar*

Pluto- Goofy ain't the only talkin' dog around here...

Daisy- What do you mean, "have a style"? Who cares about the way you dress??

Mickey- Oh Donald, I just wanna go and tickle your feathers.

Donald- Yay, things are working!

Aladdin- I better stop being a bum and go get a job or something.

Genie- I LOOOOVE slavery! I feel like good Uncle Remus at times.

Panchito- You know, they don't call us the three gay caballeros for nothing... *winks* I mean really. We're totally boning each other all the time.

Daisy- Donald I've had it with you and your temper! That's it! For now on I'm dumping you. *grabs Jose and Panchito and they go off to have a threesome*

Donald- Oh yeah!? Me too! *grabs Goofy*

Mickey- Oooh, I'm getting the biggest boner right now...

[Big Disney Fan]

Jasmine- OMG Prince Achmed is so fucking hot I get wet thinking of him. Can't wait to marry him and get all his jewels.

Wow! Jasmine's a gold-digger! Or at least a jewel-digger.

Minnie- Oh, Goofy is the sexiest man I've ever met. F*** Mickey, I want to marry Goofy!

Ironically, Goofy had the hots for her in "Ye Olden Days", though she did not, in return. This led to a duel between Mickey and Goofy for her heart.