married persons-sleeping habits

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wizzer
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married persons-sleeping habits

Post by wizzer »

i wanted to start this topic at this forum because there are alot more foreign members. i am married but me and my wife have seperate beds for sleeping. mostly because i don't sleep well and my wife is a very heavy sleeper and say when a heavy sleeper falls asleep facing the middle of the bed, there's no way for me to try to fall asleep facing the center so sleeping with a person like this is like sleeping with a wall to your back. --may sound weird but there are lots of reasons not to sleep in the same bed but no real reasons to sleep together unless you are a dependent snuggler- which i'm not. so anyway i heard places like japan seperate beds for married couples is more popular. is this true? i know alot of members on this forum are young and unmarried- if so do your parents have seperate beds? i was just thinking how well i've slept since i started sleeping in my own bed and would suggest it to any married couples with sleeping woes that are partner related. :)
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Post by catNC »

I'm married, and occasionally we have slept in separate beds. There are a number of reasons, such as he goes to work at an ungodly hour of the morning, I like to sprawl, he likes to sprawl (that doesn't work, even in a king sized bed). Now, the main reason is I just don't really seem to sleep at all anymore. Being 7 months pregnant definitely makes sleeping difficult! Our LaZboy recliner has become my bed. I know plenty of older couples who don't sleep in the same bed. I don't think it's that uncommon or strange to sleep in separate beds. I would think most couples just do what they have to do to get a good nights sleep.
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Post by pinkrenata »

I could never sleep separately from my love one if we were in the same house. But, that being said, I am young and naive and unwed.
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Post by Loomis »

pinkrenata wrote:I could never sleep separately from my love one if we were in the same house. But, that being said, I am young and naive and unwed.
I was about to ask - does this only apply to married couples?

Yes, when I am sleeping under the same roof as my beloved, I never sleep alone. And I too am unwed. I'm such a sinner. :twisted:

The rest of the time I stand on the front lawn naked, howling at the moon.
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Post by karlsen »

I think that it only has to do with individuals and how they are.

My mother and father has always shared a bed, and they have been married since they were only 20 or so.

My grand parents though had sepearte beds put together, and they were also married.

Loomis, my sugestion is that you get merried and see if thing shanges. 8)
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Post by wizzer »

Loomis wrote:
pinkrenata wrote:I could never sleep separately from my love one if we were in the same house. But, that being said, I am young and naive and unwed.
I was about to ask - does this only apply to married couples?

Yes, when I am sleeping under the same roof as my beloved, I never sleep alone. And I too am unwed. I'm such a sinner. :twisted:

The rest of the time I stand on the front lawn naked, howling at the moon.
i wasn't being specific to married couples, just two people who live with each other. i don't want this to turn into some kind of sex out of wedlock thread. thats not what i was interested in. i just want to feel normal for sleeping on bunk beds :) but as the young person said, she imagines herself sharing a bed with a loved one so its pretty standard thought that love=same bed.

catnc- i shared the same bed with my wife both times she was pregnant and it was terrible :P she tended to snore alot more besides getting up to use the bathroom every 10 minutes.
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Post by Loomis »

wizzer wrote: i wasn't being specific to married couples, just two people who live with each other. i don't want this to turn into some kind of sex out of wedlock thread. thats not what i was interested in.
Why not? It's waaaaaay more interesting :P


i just want to feel normal for sleeping on bunk beds
Well, we can't make you feel normal.

You are a freak, and there is nothing you can do about it :P

(I am, of course, just kidding/being mean).

I do, however, think it is odd for a married couple outside of a 1950s TV show to be sleeping in different beds unless there is some real problem causing one of you to not enjoy a good night's sleep.

Yet, mine is not to reason why. Mine is just to point and laugh :D
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Post by Cinderelly »

I am not married but I that doesn't mean that I am young and naive. However, based on the fact that I am not married, I will give input based on my family...

My mother and step-father share the same bed.

My father and step-mother share the same bed.

My paternal grandparents shared the same bed when they were alive.

My maternal grandparents shared the same bed until he had heart surgery, then he moved to a bed of his own to be safer. When he healed completely, they moved back into the same bed.

I honestly have never heard of any married couple not sleeping together unless for reasons such as health problems, or marital problems. As far as the Japanese culture, I have heard that the whole family sleeps together rather than everyone having seperate beds. This may or may not be true. I don't know; It is just something I've heard before.

Lastly, even if people of other cultures did sleep in different beds then that would be representative of their culture. What they do is fine with me. The fact is, that you are from America. Not that my personal opinion of you is weird; but it is probably safe to say that most American couples share the same bed and would assume marital problems of married people who sleep in seperate beds.

I don't think you are weird. :) Just because you do something that isn't excatly what is considered normal doesn't mean you are weird.
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Post by wwwjim »

I've been married for 11 years, and my wife and I have shared one bed the whole time, with a few exceptions such as one of us being sick.

That said, my mother-in-law and father-in-law sleep in separate beds.

I say don't care about what people consider normal. Just talk with your wife and decide what the two of you think the best course of action is given the circumstances.
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Post by Cinderelly »

I agree with wwwjim on this one also. Don't worry what people think. Some people are always going to think things that they shouldn't. Your private life is just that, private. :)
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Post by pinkrenata »

wizzer wrote: as the young person said, she imagines herself sharing a bed with a loved one so its pretty standard thought that love=same bed.
Just to clarify my situation a bit, I'm not that terribly young (21), and I do have a serious boyfriend. That being said, it's not a matter of imagination but of reality. There's no way my boyfriend and I are ever sleeping separately as long as we're under the same roof. It's much too painful. :tink:
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Post by wizzer »

pinkrenata wrote:
wizzer wrote: as the young person said, she imagines herself sharing a bed with a loved one so its pretty standard thought that love=same bed.
Just to clarify my situation a bit, I'm not that terribly young (21), and I do have a serious boyfriend. That being said, it's not a matter of imagination but of reality. There's no way my boyfriend and I are ever sleeping separately as long as we're under the same roof. It's much too painful. :tink:
sorry, didn't mean to under guess your age :oops: and to the others, i'm not really worried about what other people think really, i was just hoping to maybe get at least one high five from a married dude that has discovered the comfort of a bed to yourself sleep :D technicaly me and the wife still sleep in the same bed except the two halfs are stacked :wink:
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Post by Sekaino Jasmine »

My parents sleep in the same bed, and they always have. They use a king-size bed. When we moved to a rather small house, they wanted a room on the bottom floor, but because a king-sized bed would not fit in that room...they went upstairs. I find it kind of funny.

Sorry I brought that up. I just wanted to know if any other couple here uses a certain size of bed and refuses to use any other size. I mean, it does have to do with married couple sleeping habits, right? :lol:
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Post by Ballzo »

I always thought it was funny that in the olden days on televison when a married couple was shown sleeping or in their bedroom they would be in seperate beds.
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Post by Loomis »

Ballzo wrote:I always thought it was funny that in the olden days on televison when a married couple was shown sleeping or in their bedroom they would be in seperate beds.
I think the rule was, if two people were in the same bed at least one foot of one of the people had to be on the floor. :lol:

This presumably meant that people weren't about to get up to anything "naughty".

Obviously, illustrated Kama Sutra's weren't as prolific then either :D I can think of plenty of things one can do with one foot on the floor... :idea:
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Post by catNC »

Sekaino Jasmine wrote:My parents sleep in the same bed, and they always have. They use a king-size bed. When we moved to a rather small house, they wanted a room on the bottom floor, but because a king-sized bed would not fit in that room...they went upstairs. I find it kind of funny.

Sorry I brought that up. I just wanted to know if any other couple here uses a certain size of bed and refuses to use any other size. I mean, it does have to do with married couple sleeping habits, right? :lol:
We have a king bed. We will not have anything but. Anytime we sleep in a bed that is smaller, I think it's very uncomfortable. When we were looking at apartments last year and for houses this year, one of the things was our bed had to fit in the master bedroom. I've gotta have my king sized pillow top on both sides mattress!! :)
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