Escapay versus Walt Disney Home Entertainment

[Escapay]

An imaginary interview with a representative of WDHE, as we discuss Disney DVDs...

Hi there, I'm Escapay

And I'm a representative of WDHE, formerly BVHE.

So, how are things over at the old Home Entertainment division?

Not too good, our sales dropped 9% in the first quarter.

Sorry to hear that. But it's understandable, given you've been turning out mediocre-to-lame product

Well, that's really a matter of opinion. Most of our feedback has been rather positive. A lot of parents are grateful we're only putting out single-disc sets. It doesn't confuse them anymore the way two-disc sets did.

How the hell would a two-disc set confuse parents?

They're not sure which one has the movie, and their kids complain if they accidentally put in the second disc. So we decided to save two-discs for the really important collector-conscious sets, rather than for every release.

Can't these parents just read "Disc 1 - Feature Film" and know it's the movie?

They could, but we're not too concerned about the parents reading. We want the children to learn how to read, which is why we've included wonderful games such as Fun with Language and a complete English Read-Along for Peter Pan.

Yes, but English Read-Along could have been accomplished with an alternate subtitle track rather than put the entire movie on the second disc. The space wasted there could have been used towards The Walt Disney Christmas Show, or even on a new documentary about the film.

Eh, it's done.

Well, since we're on the topic of these games, what exactly is the point of most of them?

They're made to promote family time together. After the movie, parents and children can have fun by playing with a Virtual Kitten or watching an Interactive Storybook.

But what about animation fans and collectors who have no use for these games?

What about them?

Well, they're not too excited about Fun with Languages or trivia questions.

Their loss, I find them really fun.

Yes, but you used to have great features for them as well. Serious stuff like commentaries and documentaries.

Oh we have those! They're on some of our live-action titles.

Speaking of live-action...you've still got dozens of movies that have yet to see the light of day on DVD...and dozens more that are not in their original aspect ratio.

We found that our live-action titles don't get very much business.

Maybe if you put more effort into them, they would. Might I suggest an restored and anamorphic Special Edition of The Rocketeer? Or perhaps season sets of your Disneyland series, and the ever-elusive Song of the South?

I'll make a note of it, but can't promise you anything. Would you like to talk about any new or upcoming releases?

Well, recently I picked up the new "Special" Edition of The Aristocats

It's a wonderful set, isn't it?

Not really, it was originally advertised as a two-disc set but all I found was one singular silver platter.

Yeah, um, the budget for the title didn't allow for two discs after all.

Budget?

Well, we can't just spend as much as we want on each release. We had to set a budget on how much to spend and feature for it.

So...within this budget, you were only able to use one deleted song?

There's more than one?

Yes. There was also "Le Jazz Hot", "How Much You Mean to Me (and Court Me Slowly)", and "My Way's the Highway".

Wow, I never knew about it.

Richard Sherman could have told you while he was being filmed for those few minutes you had him talking about "She Never Felt Alone"

True. But we didn't think to ask him if there were any other deleted songs. Plus, we could only afford to have him talk about that one song.

So there was no chance of getting a few more people besides Richard to discuss the film? Say...voice actors Liz English, Gary Dubin, and Dean Clark, background artist Ralph Hulett, and layout artist Jon Emerson, and edit all their interviews together into a brisk 15-20 minute featurette?

What kind of family would sit through 20 minutes of people remembering the making of a cartoon?

Well, it could be for the animation fan.

True. But I don't even know who those people you mentioned were!

Okay, then...well, what about asking some contemporary historians or animators who proved to be informative in the past? People like John Canemaker, Leonard Maltin, Jeff Kurtti, or anyone that currently works at Disney?

Huh?

Come on, you guys did it for Celebrating Dumbo! Surely you could ask a handful of animators to sit in front of a camera for 10 minutes and gush about Aristocats.

We still have animators? I thought computers did everything for the movies now!

Dear lord...

Sorry, we don't do many religious-based films. It tends to polarize our audience.

Moving on...in the deleted song feature I was really excited to short clips and video footage of the storyboards, and even pencil animation!

Yeah, we have loads of that stuff in the archives, but it was agreed that not many people are too interested in seeing it. So...are you excited for our upcoming DVDs for 101 Dalmatians and Enchanted?

Somewhat, but I'm surprised that Enchanted is getting such a light amount of bonus features.

It's going to get re-released during the holiday season with a lot of new and exciting bonus features. The "serious" stuff that you were complaining about before.

Can I hold you to that?

No.

Figures...

So, have you bought any Blu-Rays yet? You haven't asked us about it.

Not yet. I'm barely able to get by on DVDs.

Blu-Ray is the future of WDHE.

I'm looking forward to Sleeping Beauty on Blu-Ray. I'll probably buy that.

You should! It has this all new recolorization - I mean restoration - and a Virtual Castle!

No new commentaries or documentaries?

You people and your documentaries...

I'm sorry, but I like them.

Well then you'll love our documentary about 101 Dalmatians, it comes out on March 4.

But it's only a half-hour long. And one of the games has an hour's worth of video clips.

Games are what draws our consumers. We think games are a huge selling point for many of our animated releases.

*tries hard not to laugh*...And that's all the time we have today, tune in again when I interview Walt Disney from the great beyond!

Scaps

[PatrickvD]

lol... good read

[PeterPanfan]

If I were you and I talked to them, they probably would have hung up.

I would literally scream at them!

You should seriously call them and ask these questions, and see how similar their answers are.

[SleepingBeautyAurora]

Ha Ha that was very funny Escapay !

[MrIncredible]

Good read, but kinda sad that some of it is what they seem to believe. The whole thing about the parents confusing which disc is which is just hillarious and actually sad, cause, as I say Disney believes it. The thing with Disney is that about 90% of the time, they make it seem like the parents are complete idiots, with that stupid fast play (which I can't tell you how annoying I find it when that comes up) to screwing all of us by making everything a slimmed down, bonus-free DVDs.

Then the other 10%, they think that they're all these geniuses and try to over complicate thing, like, I remember when Ratatouille first came out back in November, I headed down to pick it up from the Best Buy that I work at (it was my day off), and got my copy, and the place was packed with people buying it, and about a dozen people of so, were coming to me, my supervisor, and a few other blue shirts (even though I was wearing my regular jeans and sweatshirt, they somehow knew I work there) all asking if it was widescreen and what does "original theatrical aspect ratio" mean, and also asking what's a blu-ray?

As I see it, regarding the two disc confusion thing, it's like going to the local multiplex that has like 20 screens and some different on each one. How many of these "disc confusing parents" accidently took their kids to Cloverfield instead of Hannah Montana? How many can even tell that the movie they're putting in is the one their kids want to see?

It's all a bunch of non-sense. Also, on a side note, again about the two disc thing, DreamWorks has a 2 disc of Bee Movie coming next month and Fox just announced a 2 disc of Alvin and the Chipmunks, but where's a special edition of Enchanted, Cars, or Ratatouille?

[rexcrk]

Oh man, I could totally see parents being confused about which disc has the movie.

God I hope I never get that stupid (because once you become absolutely idiotic... there's no going back )

[TheSequelOfDisney]

Oh man, I could totally see parents being confused about which disc has the movie.

I guess parents aren't used to seeing discs that say "Feature Film" right undernearth "Disc 1." Geez, if my parents got like that I really don't know what I would do with them. Luckily, they aren't, so thanks to the big Guy in the sky (that would be God in case some of ya'll didn't understand it, you know what I sayin'? Home-G-Doggie in the Hiz-'Ouse!).

[rexcrk]

Oh man, I could totally see parents being confused about which disc has the movie.

I guess parents aren't used to seeing discs that say "Feature Film" right undernearth "Disc 1." Geez, if my parents got like that I really don't know what I would do with them. Luckily, they aren't, so thanks to the big Guy in the sky (that would be God in case some of ya'll didn't understand it, you know what I sayin'? Home-G-Doggie in the Hiz-'Ouse!).

wurd

[Vermin Friends]

That was actually pretty funny, although I find it sad that, fictional or not, it was the truth.

[Big Disney Fan]

Oh man, I could totally see parents being confused about which disc has the movie.

I guess parents aren't used to seeing discs that say "Feature Film" right undernearth "Disc 1." Geez, if my parents got like that I really don't know what I would do with them. Luckily, they aren't, so thanks to the big Guy in the sky (that would be God in case some of ya'll didn't understand it, you know what I sayin'? Home-G-Doggie in the Hiz-'Ouse!).

How can parents be so confused like that, I'll never know.

Sadly, that's how Disney does things nowadays, for reasons I doubt I'll ever understand. I'm so glad my parents aren't that ignorant. 'Course, that was WAY before DVDs came out, back in the days of VHS.

[Super Aurora]

This proves that Disney truly hates us.

[Big Disney Fan]

This proves that Disney truly hates us.

But that I just can't believe and never will!

[Vermin Friends]

This proves that Disney truly hates us.

But that I just can't believe and never will!

Agreed.

I don't believe they hate us, the fans of the animation. I think they just feel that it's not worth the risk. Imagine how much money goes into making a single disc, and then compare that to making an additional disc, for the... say, 50% (at the most) of buyers who are actually interested in the film, and not just watching it. I suppose it may not be very fair, but it's just the kinds of decisions they need to make. If they don't respect their fans, then whatever- that's their problem.

[BelleGirl]

I cannot wait for Esacapay's interview with Walt Disney from the great beyond!

[MrIncredible]

More things to note about the disc confusion, looking at my copies of a few Disney two- discers, and on every single one of them, right now I have my copy of Jungle Book right in front of me, the first disc is clearly marked "Disc 1, feature running time 78 minutes" plus has the logo for FastPlay, the Disney Enhanced Home Theatre Mix (which, btw, I can't hear a difference between) and all the ratings. the second, however just says "Disc 2, Bonus Material". Plus they have actual discs designs that further show a difference in discs, unlike Paramount, which uses the same grey colour on every one of their titles now, including DreamWorks, like I can see how someone could get that confused, although it does have in big writing (bigger than Disney's) that say Bonus Features or Feature Film. Can't wait to see all the parents getting their Bee Movie discs confused on that film's 2 disc DVD (which I still don't understand how that's getting 2 discs and yet Cars and Ratatouille and others are stuck with one disc).

[Ariel'sprince]

Ha,that was funny espically the part about the recolorization in Sleeping Beauty PE XD.

[Disney Duster]

These were my favorites:

Yes, but English Read-Along could have been accomplished with an alternate subtitle track rather than put the entire movie on the second disc. The space wasted there could have been used towards The Walt Disney Christmas Show, or even on a new documentary about the film.

Eh, it's done.

What kind of family would sit through 20 minutes of people remembering the making of a cartoon?

That's so tragically true.

Huh?

[We still have animators? I thought computers did everything for the movies now!

OMG

You should! It has this all new recolorization - I mean restoration

Yes!

However, I didn't like how you presented the games and virtual castle, because I actually find them very cool. I mean, if we love going on adventures and seeing great animation with these characters, why wouldn't you like going on other, interactive adventures with them in new, sometimes 3-D animation? I do.

[Escapay]

Thanks for the compliments, everyone! It was a lot of fun writing it, though I looked back and sadly realized that as comical as it was, it really is all tragically true.

but where's a special edition of Enchanted, Cars, or Ratatouille?

A two-disc limited edition of Cars was available via EzyDVD in Australia, and France is getting a two-disc edition of Ratatouille. If you're in the US, Wal-Mart and Target originally sold store-exclusive bonus discs for both (though the Wal-Mart Ratatouille bonus wasn't movie-specific, it was food-specific).

(that would be God in case some of ya'll didn't understand it, you know what I sayin'? Home-G-Doggie in the Hiz-'Ouse!).

This proves that Disney truly hates us.

Oh so true...

However, I didn't like how you presented the games and virtual castle, because I actually find them very cool. I mean, if we love going on adventures and seeing great animation with these characters, why wouldn't you like going on other, interactive adevntures with them in new, sometimes 3-D animation? I do.

Don't get me wrong, I like some of the games too (I always play them once just out of courtesy to the creators, and something that sounded stupid in print can sometimes play really well and become a rare game that I'll revisit again). My jabs at them in the "interview" was towards the fact that Disney feels that games are the "better" feature, the one should be promoted over everything else. Every promotion will always mention the movie, deleted scenes, and games, and anything else you have to find out by either reading the press release, reading the back of the box, or discovering it on the disc. If Disney wants to devote a single release to families and collectors alike such as their single-disc double-dips, the least they could do was balance one with the other (games vs. making-of material).

Scaps

[Disney Duster]

Every promotion will always mention the movie, deleted scenes, and games, and anything else you have to find out by either reading the press release, reading the back of the box, or discovering it on the disc. If Disney wants to devote a single release to families and collectors alike such as their single-disc double-dips, the least they could do was balance one with the other (games vs. making-of material).

Yea but what if Disney just promoted the deleted scenes and games the kids and families want most, and the collectors look for the other material, since that's just a more collector thing to do anyway (kids an families apparently don't careto do mcuh searching or reading).

[BrandonH]

There are two problems with the current DVD releases for collectors. The press release says "and much more!" and makes us wonder what decent features will be on the disc. They should just tell us up front. Too often, the "much more!" evaporates or refers to a stills gallery. That's not catering to the collectors at all.

All I ask for are some decent DVDs and press releases that leave no ambiguity as to what the buyer is getting.