The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the air

[Wonderlicious]

Duster, having also experienced depression, I can understand how you feel and I want you to feel strong. At the risk of sounding too personal, I was just wondering if you have also received any psychotherapy. Being on antidepressants is in any case a good thing, as it keeps the hormonal imbalance caused by depression under wraps, but I really do think talking therapy is required as well, despite the negative stigma.

I'm not going to get too deep into things, but I've had bouts of depression many times, but it was the last bout of depression/anxiety I had around a year or two ago where I finally got some proper form of help. I was referred by my GP (family doctor/general physician for those who don't get British English) to receive some talking therapy, and what I received was something called CBT. It consisted of training sessions on how to actively turn negative feelings and emotions into more balanced, positive thoughts. It was originally hard to do, but in the long run, it's really helped me, probably more than my medication.

[Disney Duster]

Thank you so much Wondy. I have indeed had talkative therapy, too. I even saw psychologists before I ever got depressed. But when I went to the phsychologist for my new depression and also to address my whole "breaking through my soul" thing, he told me to do things that involved deciding my thoughts didn't always mean something (as in, my bad thoughts didn't mean anything), and since I believed my thoughts were from my soul, it made me not want to do his exercises. Going to him actually made me more anxiety ridden because I had to do certain things with my mind I didn't want to do. And talking never got me anywhere. I wanted to feel like my soul was back, and he couldn't bring that. I think only nature/God can do that. I wondered if maybe science could, but when I went to the hospital I just got medicine for anxiety, sleep, and "racing thoughts".

Anyway, eventually I one day said I felt good when he asked me how I was doing, so he said "Then why are you here?", and since I didn't want to go anymore, I thought that was the best time to stop seeing him. Now I'm just trying to be happy as I can and I'm very glad I don't have to see him anymore, he wasn't something I wanted to do.

Thank you so kindly for your help, and I'm sorry you have depression. I'm glad you have ways of getting out of your depression.

[disneyboy20022]

Well I had Occupational Therapy the past month and it went didn't help. So now I'm having an EMG test which is short for Electromyography which basically they are going to test my nerves in my wrist with a needle and electricity to see how bad my nerves are. I can't exactly explain what it is, but I believe Wikipedia can. From what my mom has told me, it's pretty dang painful and unlike anything I've ever had so that's very nerve wracking for me right now.

Here's the wikipedia link on what it is.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electromyography

Also right now I currently weigh 326 pounds which is a lot, however back in April of 2013 I weighed 380 and 3 years ago I actually got as high as 480, so overall I'm doing a hell of a lot better and am able to walk without any issues thanks to the herniated disc being healed. My girlfriend says I'm in the best shame she's ever seen me in and she's right.

[thedisneyspirit]

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[Escapay]

To Write Love on Her Arms

Albert

[Disney Duster]

That was a sweet story Albert. It really does bring out hope.

I'm sorry disneyboy that your hand still hurts, but I hope the new EMG thing can help. I never knew carpel-tunnel could be so painful. I'm really glad your herniated disc is healed though! And that your wait is lower now. Is this the lowest it's ever been?

Thedisneyspirit, don't give up! Don't got yourself or have suicidal thoughts! I can't believe your runs your Facebook. Can't you login and change your password? I can't believe he told you you might deserve some of that horrible treatment! He really is horrible! I wouldn't delete your Facebook because it does serve to connect with the world and people who really do care, but I would just unfriend all the people who hurt you.

[disneyboy20022]

I'm sorry disneyboy that your hand still hurts, but I hope the new EMG thing can help. I never knew carpel-tunnel could be so painful. I'm really glad your herniated disc is healed though! And that your wait is lower now. Is this the lowest it's ever been?

Pretty Much it is. I know when I was 18 and on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, I remember weighing 360 pounds which is 30 pounds more than what I currently weigh. I'm going to start working out at the YMCA however first I need to get my wrists feeling better.

One thing is that my wrists and fingers get episodes of going numb at random times and the numbness is increasing. This test will show what nerves are being effected and where the problem is located at. Such as it could come from my neck because I don't have the best posture, but I'm in Physical Therapy for that. I get to have the test done on my girlfriend's Birthday.

Now if the Nerve is too badly damaged for a shot, sometimes surgery happens. I know that did happen with my mom, and when I asked her about the EMG she said that she wasn't going to lie and that it would be more painful then the epidurals I've had given it's kinda like having an electric chair poked at you.

[Disney Duster]

I'm glad you're at your lowest weight ever! I hope this test tells you what needs to be done to fix it, and I hope it's not too painful, but the pain is worth it to fix it.

[Wiggles]

I've just been suffering from REALLY BAD anxiety lately. I worry and get worked up about anything and everything to the point where I'm sleep deprived and make myself an unhealthy mess. This picture pretty much describes me the past couple of weeks:

[bradhig]

I suffer from nightmares from that voltron forum mess. Repeats of old discussions and arguemenets with an abusive moderator there mostly. Her name was Princess Allurap. First she has the ability to ban / unban users she claims cause the admin at the time was lazy and claimed he didn't have time to police the board yet he had time to post announcements and stuff on the facebook page. She wouldn't let me talk about princess Allura wearing her gown anymore cause she said other people were tired of it Really? I only mentioned it like three or four times that I remember. She constantly accused me of being obsessed with Allura's gown cause I wouldn't stop talking about it when I never mentioned it for a long time and also cause I had a scrrencap of the princess in my signature. She kept telling to me to seek professional help for a problem that didn't exist but she believed it did. She deliberatly allowed other users mostly other mods to harass me. She said in a PM at one point let the harassment to continue cause you won't help yourself. My psychologist says I am no obsessed and I believe her over some stupid mod. When I said in one thread that the company that made Voltron should make a new property one users accused me of shitting on the company and voltron. PrincessAllurap posted an offensive image of something written on a piece of toilet paper and wanted me to leave. She always yelled then leave at the end of most PMs she sent. She sent me so called mod warning for stating something was ripped off from something else , starting a discussion about gowns , and for defending myself. I believe she and other mods used the admin to get me banned cause he said he would suspend anyone's account if two or more people complained to him. I can't even write my voltron fanfic like I used to cause it won't flow through my head anymore. I told her and others repeatedly that the problem with princess allura I had was caused by Asperger's syndrome and they refused to accept the truth. How could people thought to be adults be soo mean to other people online?

That's way I hate mods and repat to buttons and got mad aware back when I got reported here. It's also why I don't talk much here.

[MeerkatKombat]

It's interesting how many Disney fans also suffer mental health problems. Just a thought.

It's been six years since my nervous breakdown. I saw a psychiatrist for two years, a psychotherapist for one and have had three bouts of CBT. I always thought CBT was very useful but I do know this doesn't work for everyone.

I've also taken my fair share of anti-anxiety/depression/psychotic tablets and I can't say I like them. The side effects always outweigh the benefits for me. The only one I've ever felt helped me was Prozac but even then that has left me with digestive problems I can't shift.

I still get the really bad weeks where I don't want to do anyway and I can't find enjoyment in anything. I've just returned from Rome and I have terrible post holiday blues. Rome has an ancient fairy tale look to it and London seems so bland and boring. I also get this feeling really badly after returning from Disneyland. You never notice how grey the world it until you come back from Disneyland. Coming back from holiday plops me back in my currently rather pathetic life and it stings. Give it a week and I'm sure it will clear.

I've decided to train as a counselor and it's really great. It helps me control my depression a lot more than talkative therapies ever did and for once I feel I am the master. I feel more self aware of what is causing my depression and that helps to shift it quicker.

How could people thought to be adults be soo mean to other people online?

They are anonymous. It is much easier to be a dick to someone behind a computer screen. I know how hard it is but you should try and let that experience go. Sadly, they aren't going to answer for their bad treatment of you. Don't fixate on it. Not all forums are like that.

[bradhig]

It was an emotional blow to me. It's hard to forgot sometimes.

[disneyboy20022]

It was an emotional blow to me. It's hard to forgot sometimes.

And most likely you want forget it 100% at times. My late grandpa said that he could forgive, however not forget.

Also I've had events in my life that while I have moved on from them, every now and then something will trigger those events that were very stressful at the time they happened and feel like they are happening right now, even if the event took place 18 years ago, it's still painful even though I've moved on. Hang in there bradhig and try to create new better memories to place over those bad ones and that's what I try to do in life. For instance, perhaps you can make good memories here to blanket over those bad ones.

[Disney Duster]

Oh man I hope things get better for you Wiggles. It's ok, try to relax, it'll be ok.

I'm sorry about the horrible people at that forum bradhig. I see that they got frustrated and didn't know what to do, but they shouldn't have been so mean to you. But you have a much friendlier forum here who likes you. I know I like you. : )

Wow MeerkatKombat, I'm sorry about all that. But at least the holiday blues do pass. And maybe someday you could move to place you like better. And you are now training for a job you might like better! That should make your life better! Try to be happy. : )

[bradhig]

The mod there said she was told to run things like the Official Star Trek run by Paramount. I guess she didn't know Paramount killed several other Trek boards when they opened the official site to increase traffic there. She said posters were getting eaten alive there really?

Would you tell someone to stop talking about their favorite subject cause other people complained about it? I would want a solution that satisfies both sides not just one as they did.

[disneyboy20022]

bradhig, the best thing is to try your best to move on. That's my best advice that I feel can give.

[Disney Duster]

Well bradhig, you're right you should be free to talk about whatever you want, as long as you don't talk about it so much it bothers other people. Then you may have to find your own thread to talk about it all you want. I know it doesn't sound fair, but when someone talks to much about something that it bothers other people a lot, it needs to stop.

[disneyboy20022]

My girlfriend and fiancee h as Asperger Syndrome, and has been struggling for a long time with other personalities in her head is currently in the psych ward getting help. It's honestly one of the nicest one's I've ever been to, where they let her go to the desk and ask for juice when she needs it and walk around the halls freely. It's been a long time hoping she would get help, and I think it's due in part to the movie Frozen and Elsa, not to mention the lyrics to Let it Go. Keep her and I in your thoughts and prayers.

This is why I love Let it go, because someday I'm writing and article saying How Elsa Saved Jessica

[Disney Duster]

I've been praying for you and your girlfriend many nights. I'll keep on praying for you both. It sounds like such a sad thing your girlfriend's going through. I really hope she gets better soon. How did Frozen and it's characters and "Let It Go" help her?

[disneyboy20022]

I've been praying for you and your girlfriend many nights. I'll keep on praying for you both. It sounds like such a sad thing your girlfriend's going through. I really hope she gets better soon. How did Frozen and it's characters and "Let It Go" help her?

Mainly Elsa and Let It Go Helped her. Because she's kept all of this inside her for about 20 years plus, and her differ people have told her not to let it show and be the good girl you always have to be and that' she can't keep it in anymore. Such as Elsa kept her powers a secret for many years, my girlfriend has kept the details of all of this in her for many years. She's been singing Let It Go a lot lately and has told me herself when it comes to this she feels like Elsa and have asked her directly about it.