The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the air

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thedisneyspirit
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by thedisneyspirit »

I suppose that is true, life is rather unpredictable, in a way, and that's the beauty of it, isn't it? That it leads us to different paths? I don't think our world would be the same if we all went towards the same career or goals (and even then, at least back in the day you didn't even need to go to college to work in certain fields), but at least it would be nice if we were a little more prepared, or society at large gave us time to reflect, or just schools tried to help us (I know some do, but others really...Don't). I know usually at around 15/16/17 is when you start thinking about it, but man at that age a lot of kids were more concerned about trivial teen stuff over the genuine important stuff...And school really demotivates anyone.

I'll take your prayers. I really need any prayers or positive thoughts in any manner possible these months, for the studying, to pass the exams, to get money again, and also for my papers to be in order and there's no legal issue and I can enter into this alright. I'm also traveling on Sunday and it's been chaotic to pack all the stuff I had lying around, and I fear I don't think I'll manage to pack everything (I'm only allowed to take 3 suitcases).
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by thedisneyspirit »

Well, I didn't pass the test. There's another chance to do it next year, and my parents have given me the opportunity to completely dedicate myself to studying the whole year for it. I can do it, since honestly, I did manage to understand all the new information I was gathering, but I still feel very sad and uncertain at times. To pass for this exam there are like, 7-8 exams, and while only the first two are about studying, they could easily fail me in one of the psychological tests. :( I know I don't really have the best personality, but I'm not sure what else can I do aside from maybe reading therapy books or the like to get a positive result. I just wish I had passed the first one so I wouldn't end up like this, I've only got one last chance, and it's just annoying I couldn't pass from the first exam, if only because I would want to know the details of the psychological tests to not fail those.

Sorry if lately I've been so cranky, it's just that honestly these months have been very stressful for me, doing chores every single day while studying all this completely new information.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

:( :( :( I am so sorry. To put so much hard work into the test to not pass is heartbreaking; I really am sorry. Are you going to take your parents up on their offer? You know how there are study books/website for the SAT/LSAT/other standardized tests? I wonder if you Google "test preparation" or something for this test, or even "diplomatic academy psychological" if you'll get some insight into that part of the test to prepare for it.
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thedisneyspirit
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by thedisneyspirit »

Yes, I think I will. Honestly, my biggest problem was the fact that I really only had a month and a half for preparing for this test, and I would've needed more time. I think with a whole year, I can manage. Besides, the studies aren't that hard, and I found it also very fun. Without all the stress of time, I think I can manage.

In the meantime, as well as studying, taking my own pace, I'm doing what you're saying, Amy, finding psychological tests online to practice with them. They're fun and don't require much if any studying, so it helps me also to loosen up when I'm too overfilled with the studies. I think this year I'm also gonna try improving my French, since knowing more languages always helps, and my French is a little rusty.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Disney's Divinity »

I'm sorry. :( At least you have a second chance to take the test thanks to your parents. Good luck. :up: :)
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

Look at you taking the bull by the horns! "Yeah, I've already started studying, and taking psychological tests, and brushing up on my French, no big deal." I am super proud of you!!!
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Disney Duster »

Oh, I am so sorry you failed the test the first time, thedisneyspirit. But I'm glad you have a second chance, that's awesome, and that you think with more time, you will pass! So, yes, keep studying and practicing! You're awesome!
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Rose Dome »

I'am sorry, disneyspirit. Don't give up though. You're evidently a hard worker and although I don't likely know you offline you come across as both confident and caring from how you post :)
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

Venting is good...I can't breathe good. Almost 2 years ago I developed a cough. (5 months after starting my current job.) My doctor tried everything, and nothing helped. Then at the beginning of this year, I started seeing an allergist/asthma doctor (I've had asthma since I was born). I'm allergic to so much. But I started getting allergy shots, and my cough went away for a few months. Then it came back with a vengeance, and I can't breathe good. My primary care doctor and my allergist have pretty much done all they can do. So I just asked for a referral to a pulmonologist (lung doctor) since my mom suggested it. It's scary when you can't breathe good and you've tried everything, and the doctors and nurses ask if your inhaler helps, and you say kind of, for the briefest of moments...and they ask if a certain allergy pill, the one that is supposed to help with mold, is one I've tried; I say yes, and it did nothing.

I mentioned "5 months after starting my current job" because my doctor, who works for the company I work for, said that there's a major mold problem in our buildings. But she said that any old building in Florida will have a mold issue. I saw a different allergy doctor on Tuesday, and he insinuated that I don't work there anymore, that I find another job, somewhere where I can breathe... :( :o :shock: :? :oops: :cry:
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Disney's Divinity »

I'm so sorry, bc85! :( I hope that doctors can help you and that you won't have to leave your job, or that, if you do have to leave your job, your health will improve proving the work environment was the problem and you'll be able to find another job quickly (and one that you enjoy!).
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

Thank you <3 I guess all I can do at this point is wait for this new doctor to call... :(
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Rose Dome »

I'am very sorry about your situation, Cauldron. You can try getting treatment that allows you to keep your job but if that doesn't work you at least have a solid explanation for why you left it.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

Thank you :) It's scary, because while my other jobs in this area (I moved here 5.5 years ago) didn't trigger my asthma, who's to say that the next one won't? And job-hunting is the worst. I don't want major lung damage, though..... :(
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Disney Duster »

Oh no! Not breathing so well really sounds scary! I hope the doctors do make you better soon, and if not, that you get to a job that is better for you, even though finding one is hard. What's happening to you really sucks, I'm sorry. I will pray for you!
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

Thank you, DD! Still waiting on that note doctor to call (I know it can take a while...). :(
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by DC Fan »

Have a long story to tell. But I'll summarize it.

I have a unique condition, so much in fact that I may be the only person in the world to have it. I have constant pain in my legs. I can't be standing for too long, just walking for half an hour can give me pain, I wake up with pain that lasts at least an hour.

There's no medication than can help me. Currently, within my medication, I wear 50mg morphine patches and not even that.

As it is I can't work. A normal job that is. I need to be labeled as handicapped so I can receive money and also do that, through the government (in Spain where I live) they can place me on a job that would handle my situation. It has taken years for it to be acknowledged. Two times I've applied and two times denied. I've applied a third time through a lawyer that doesn't understand why I was denied. Until that happens I barely make ends meet and, as an adult, have to depend of off the money from my parents and haven't been able to be independent and start a family of my own.

Don't know what to do. People tell you to wait. Be them people around or the time it takes for paperwork to be done. Very easy to say than to live. How should I pay for my medication, food and apartment? How can I meet someone and start a family?

On top of the pain and my needs I also feel depressed as should be. Went to a psychiatrist (have to go through one first in order to transfer you to a psychologist). But because I wasn't trying to kill myself I didn't deserved to be treated.

In the meantime, something as trivial as videogames would keep my mind occupied (since I always liked them/a hobby and even doctors have told me that I should distract my mind off my pain and situation) but of course I don't have the money to buy a console.

... again, sounds superficial, but when my life has been put on hold for years, have to live/endure with pain and have no money to be independent this trivial thing is something.


Sorry if I posted this before. Don't remember.

... another thing I have to talk my doctor about since I've been having memory issues.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

DC Fan, that sucks. I'm really sorry. I sure hope your lawyer can get you on disability. I've experienced how hard it is to not have a job and be dependent on others; I'm sad for you that your life is on hold, as you feel. And being in pain all the time ...just awful. I wish I had advice or more words of comfort...I think you're brave for dealing with this every day.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by Disney Duster »

Oh, that is so, so sad DC Fan. Those are all terrible things to happen to anyone. I know a lot of times getting money from the government is denied the first few times because they only want the people who keep perservering to get it. I really hope you get it. That whole you not getting a pschycologist because you weren't going to kill yourself is bull. You wanting a console is absolutely important when it's one of the few things that makes you happy. I have a depression that no matter how much they try to treat it, my mind still keeps me miserable, so I can relate a little, all I can say is be thankful you still feel like you have a soul and your mind isn't destroying you, even if it can feel like sometimes sadness destroys you. Just be happy your mind isn't destroying itself. Try to appreciate anything you can. You truly are brave for dealing with all this. I will pray for you.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by DC Fan »

Thank you all.

To give an idea, it takes 10 months for the government to answer to my disability. Meanwhile I'm the one that has to live with constant pain (I'm in my 30s) and how I am supposed to pay for my medication and everyday needs?

To not live a normal life. To be able to go out, eat out, to go to stores and buy...

Besides, I want to be useful. It's not like I want money and be done with it. Even if I can live off of the government I'd volunteer in animal shelter for instance. Besides, my goal is to open a store.

Again, thank you for the messages and your thoughts.
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Re: The Universe has stomped on me thread. Rant or clear the

Post by blackcauldron85 »

I'm glad that you have goals; you just need that helping hand. I really hope you get that $ and try to start living how you want to.
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