DVDizzy Forum

^ Thank you.

Actually, I feel a little bit guilty and selfish. You see, with my grandma just having died and my mother taking care of the funeral, all I can think of is Wendy. And it's not that I'm not sad that my grandma died, but that she did is a fact I can't change. It's just something that is definite and, as I said, I knew she wanted it this way. Tomorrow is back to work for me and I want to talk to W. after hours. I hope she wants to, too. I'm sure she would've send me a comforting text message had we not been in this messy situation. Friday is the funeral. My mother outlined to me roughly how it will go. It all sounds so clinical and standard, like all funerals I've been to. I can't help but think we have so many strange rituals that seem so empty and hollow to me. Or maybe that's just the cynic in me.

I'm really beginning to hate hearing the same people who judge me for being gay referring to Tim Tebow as "Football Jesus". What's not blasphemous about that? Ugh, morons.

Goliath wrote:^ Thank you.

Actually, I feel a little bit guilty and selfish. You see, with my grandma just having died and my mother taking care of the funeral, all I can think of is Wendy. And it's not that I'm not sad that my grandma died, but that she did is a fact I can't change. It's just something that is definite and, as I said, I knew she wanted it this way. Tomorrow is back to work for me and I want to talk to W. after hours. I hope she wants to, too. I'm sure she would've send me a comforting text message had we not been in this messy situation. Friday is the funeral. My mother outlined to me roughly how it will go. It all sounds so clinical and standard, like all funerals I've been to. I can't help but think we have so many strange rituals that seem so empty and hollow to me. Or maybe that's just the cynic in me.

Don't feel guilty

As you say; your Grandmother's death is something certain, while the trouble you're having at work isn't. Good on you for having a forgiving attitude though

On the subject of rituals, I find funerals strange too. The sadness of the death is focussed on despite the fact that the average person would rather just remember the happy moments, and someone is commemorated in a place where they never (or very rarely) were during their lifetime. It just doesn't gel. Weddings are more powerful for me. Sure they usually happen in a place where the couple will spend virtually none of their marriage, but they're much closer to what people really feel like doing. You don't want to put on alot of black, and dwell on the fact that Grandad is no longer around, when you could be thinking about all the laughter you shared with him, but you do feel like having a happy and beautiful celebration when you find someone wonderful to share your life with. I can only imagine the latter at this point in time

Sorry to ramble. You just got me thinking

I got fired today.

Along with 10 other people, including W. It was in the nature of our contract that we could be fired at any given moment, whenever there wouldn't be enough work to keep us all employed. Which became clear today.

The day began so good; I really thought this would be a great day. I got a text message from W. this morning. She expressed how sorry she felt over the whole situation; that she regretted what she had done; and she apologized for all the things she did wrong. I was so excited and totally ready to talk to her after working hours and have everything out of the way. Then I first learned she was let go and had gone home already and then, that I had to go, too. We've been texting back and forth this evening. We will meet later this week to talk things over.

It's a strange feeling to know you don't have to get up in time tomorrow morning; that you don't have anything to go to or anything to do. And to know you suddenly won't be seeing your co-workers anymore. Still, I finally have some peace of mind now.

Goliath wrote:I got fired today.

Along with 10 other people, including W. It was in the nature of our contract that we could be fired at any given moment, whenever there wouldn't be enough work to keep us all employed. Which became clear today.

Usually that being called being laid-off.

Super Aurora wrote:Usually that being called being laid-off.

Doesn't matter how it's called; it still sucks.

Goliath~ Sorry to hear about all you've had going on.

My dad always said that funerals are not for the dead, but for the loved ones that are left behind. It's a form of closure for many, even if it seems "clinical and standard" to some. We didn't even have a funeral for my mother due to the circumstances of her death; instead we had a memorial service in my grandma's city while she was being cremated, and a separate memorial service when we returned to my hometown. While my mother was relatively young, it was one of those cases where it was a blessing because she wouldn't be suffering anymore. It was a very difficult, confusing time for me; I felt guilty for being relieved and feeling preoccupied with my social life when she was so sick (I was still practically a kid) and didn't feel at all "rational" about it until many years later, however you want to take that. And it was sort of the opposite when my father died; I initially felt very "rational" and didn't find myself getting emotional until after the fact. But it's different in every case, of course.

Losing a job for whatever reason always sucks. I was laid off from the best job I'd ever had several years back, and the frustrating part was that it was completely out of my hands as it was due to poor business decisions of the business owner. All I could do at the time was keep my eyes open and move on to something different. I was overqualified for my next job, but it in a strange way it ended up being a learning experience in that I found out a lot about myself and my capabilities. Maybe it's the naive optimist in me, but I tend to think that everything happens for the best, no matter how much it may suck at the time.

Today my boyfriend told me that his license got suspended, and I won't be able to see him for a month because I can't drive, and I'm blaming it on myself for being stupid and not learning how to drive when I was 16.

Goliath wrote:I got fired today.

Along with 10 other people, including W. It was in the nature of our contract that we could be fired at any given moment, whenever there wouldn't be enough work to keep us all employed. Which became clear today.

The day began so good; I really thought this would be a great day. I got a text message from W. this morning. She expressed how sorry she felt over the whole situation; that she regretted what she had done; and she apologized for all the things she did wrong. I was so excited and totally ready to talk to her after working hours and have everything out of the way. Then I first learned she was let go and had gone home already and then, that I had to go, too. We've been texting back and forth this evening. We will meet later this week to talk things over.

It's a strange feeling to know you don't have to get up in time tomorrow morning; that you don't have anything to go to or anything to do. And to know you suddenly won't be seeing your co-workers anymore. Still, I finally have some peace of mind now.

I'm sorry to hear you got sacked. You must be feeling awful

I know this is pretty empty, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm still thinking of you

P.S: While it's terrible that you got sacked, it's wonderful to hear that your friend has apologised

^ Thanks, Disney Geek. Doesn't sound empty at all; it's sweet.

Yep, 2012 started off really swell.

Yesterday, I said goodbye to almost everybody with whom I got along well at work, except for my direct supervisor who had a day off. Today I went back to say goodbye to her and thank her for everything she has done for me and to shower her with well-deserved compliments. God knows she was always there for me (and for all my co-workers, too) and always placed the needs of her employees before anything else. I've never worked for somebody who's that patient, flexible and, most of all, dedicated to her employees.

Going back today also meant: running into that girl I was crazy about. I had said goodbye to her yesterday already when, while waiting for a friend to finish her work, I had the opportunity to look at her from a distance, unnoticed by her. It took my friend a while, so I found myself just staring at her. I noticed one of my co-workers noticing me, but I didn't give a damn. This was my last time to see her --I thought. So today, I saw her again, as she joined me and my supervisor. All that time I would think: "I'm never gonna meet anybody anymore who's SOOOOOOO smoking hot". I could just watch her all day and never get bored. Just so frustrating a thought that she'll never be mine.

Well, I guess getting outta there is a positive thing when it comes to forgetting her, eh?

(This "the glass is half full"-mentality is soooo not me.)

Goliath wrote:^ Thanks, Disney Geek. Doesn't sound empty at all; it's sweet.

Yep, 2012 started off really swell.

Yesterday, I said goodbye to almost everybody with whom I got along well at work, except for my direct supervisor who had a day off. Today I went back to say goodbye to her and thank her for everything she has done for me and to shower her with well-deserved compliments. God knows she was always there for me (and for all my co-workers, too) and always placed the needs of her employees before anything else. I've never worked for somebody who's that patient, flexible and, most of all, dedicated to her employees.

Going back today also meant: running into that girl I was crazy about. I had said goodbye to her yesterday already when, while waiting for a friend to finish her work, I had the opportunity to look at her from a distance, unnoticed by her. It took my friend a while, so I found myself just staring at her. I noticed one of my co-workers noticing me, but I didn't give a damn. This was my last time to see her --I thought. So today, I saw her again, as she joined me and my supervisor. All that time I would think: "I'm never gonna meet anybody anymore who's SOOOOOOO smoking hot". I could just watch her all day and never get bored. Just so frustrating a thought that she'll never be mine.

Well, I guess getting outta there is a positive thing when it comes to forgetting her, eh?

that's rough, man. *pats him on the shoulder*

(This "the glass is half full"-mentality is soooo not me.)

so i've noticed.

Had a miscarriage today.

enigmawing wrote:Had a miscarriage today.

I know this may seem empty and might not mean much from me, but I am so sorry. I feel so powerless when I hear things like this; especially from people I have (sort of) come to known. I don't even know what to say, besides that I can't even imagine what you are going through right now. All I can say is I hope you can somehow come out of this stronger than you were. Please take it easy and just remember that it will get better. Feel and heal well, enigma.

enigmawing wrote:Had a miscarriage today.

Aw, E.. I'm horribly, horribly sorry. I can't imagine how this is affecting you and Ray, but I sincerely wish you two the best.

enigmawing wrote:Had a miscarriage today.

I'm so sorry

I cannot comprehend the despair you must be going through.

That is the only way I can word what I am feeling for you right now. My thoughts are with you during what must be a horrendous time

enigmawing wrote:Had a miscarriage today.

Oh no, E. I simply can't imagine how that must feel, but I hope that you and Ray can find some way of overcoming this tragic loss

enigmawing wrote:Had a miscarriage today.

I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope you find strength to cope with this loss.

enigmawing wrote:Had a miscarriage today.

I also hope everything gets better. I'm really sorry.

I'm so sorry. Nothing much else can be said, I guess.

enigmawing- I'm so sorry to hear that. You are in my prayers.