To show my appreciation to Disney's "Frozen" after it won the Golden Globe Award for Best Animated Picture, I wrote a parody as a gift. Here it is.
How Disney’s “Frozen” Should Have Ended, or Foretold
PLEASE NOTE: The characters and plot in this story belong to Walt Disney Animation Studios. This is for unofficial comedy purposes only.
The story begins with two sisters, princesses Elsa and Anna, in the kingdom of Arendelle. The kingdom of Arendelle is surrounded by mountain landscapes, fjord, and a town beside it. Elsa is the oldest, and Anna is the youngest. They play at night in the throne room while their parents are asleep. Elsa has a secret. She can create snow and ice from her hands. She has wintry magic within her. She uses it to create snow hills, ice, and a snowman named Olaf. Anna became very excited with her wintry magic, and pursues her to do more. Elsa casts her wintry magic to create snow pillars for Anna to climb on, but when Anna goes too fast, Elsa accidentally struck her head which caused her to fall to the ground feeling cold and unconscious. When Elsa saw that in shock, she comes to her to comfort her. As she comforts her, Anna’s few strands of hair turn white, and Elsa cries out to her parents. As her fear grows, her wintry magic expands all over the throne room creating frost on every wall of the throne. Her parents rushed inside the throne room, they become shocked to see Anna unconscious. Elsa says to them that it was an accident. The king knows where to take Anna. And so, the king and queen take Elsa and Anna to see the trolls.
The trolls live in an enchanted place, where it is surrounded by rocks, the ground smooth from the outside world, few steams coming out from the ground of the Earth, and steps of rocks that surround the open. When the king, queen, Elsa, and Anna came to the trolls living place, the king calls to the trolls for help. The rocks from the top of the rock steps roll at the open where the king, queen, Elsa, and Anna are. And then, they reveal themselves as trolls. Trolls are small rock creatures with big ears, big nose, and eyes of a human being who know everything about magic. The eldest troll, with yellow beard and yellow hair, is the wisest troll. He comes forth and asks the king what happened. The king explains that Elsa accidentally struck Anna at her head with her wintry power. The queen holds Anna in her arms. The wise troll asks the queen to bring Anna close to him.
He examines her, and said, “You’re lucky it wasn’t her heart, or else she’s doom. But her head can be eased.”
The king replied, “Do what you can.”
The wise troll removes the accident that Elsa made on Anna. He made Anna remember that she accidentally hit hear head at the seat of the throne. Anna is recovered.
The wise troll says to her that her wintry magic will only grow stronger. There’s beauty, but danger that could cause her life. He said to her, “You must learn to control your fear, because fear is what makes your magic stronger, and fear will be your foe.”
The king says to the wise troll, “She will learn to control her fear, I’m sure of it. I’ll barricade my palace, reduce the staff, and keep Elsa’s powers hidden from everyone, even Anna.”
But the wise troll replied, “That won’t be necessary.”
“Why not?” the king said feeling a bit uncertain.
“There’s a way for her to control her fear.”
“How?” asked Elsa.
The wise troll turned to Elsa. “Love my dear, love.”
“How do I control my fear with love?”
He puts on Ben’s hat from the Sylvester Stallone feature “Rocky,” and said in a rough accent, “I shall teach you how, but it’s challenging as you may think.”
Elsa replied with one of her fists up feeling confident, “Let’s do it!”
And so the next day as Rocky’s song plays in the background from the “Rocky” series 1-3 and 6, Elsa wakes up in her warm up suit, runs out of her room, and starts exercising towards the trolls to get ready for her training. Anna wakes up, gets her clothes on, and decides to follow her. But her parents need her to stay to give Elsa time for training, and she can’t be bothered. Anna felt a bit sad, but understands the situation. Elsa makes it to the trolls, and the wise troll gives her training. For her first day training, the wise troll asks her to think something horrifying, and learn to subdue it. She remembers the time she accidentally struck Anna at her head last night, and her blast of ice struck all around the stone steps. The trolls ducked to protect themselves from Elsa’s attacks.
The wise troll teaches her. “Now I want you to think of something joyful, so that your power will remain calm. Try to relax if you can.”
Elsa replied, “I’ll try.”
Elsa tries to think of something joyful. She pretends that she didn’t struck Anna in the head, but created a slide to get her down gently. Also, she imagines herself telling her little sister to not go far and take it steady. Her imagination defrosted parts of ice that was struck on the stone steps. The trolls became fascinated by her behavior, and applaud her accomplishment. Elsa had never felt so relieved to see her icy power calm. The wise troll became pleased.
The wise troll says to Elsa, “You’ve done well Elsa, but there’s still more training to do. As you get older, your power will grow. You must learn to sustain your power almost everyday till you’re an adult. It’s the only way to control your power.”
Elsa replied, “Understood.”
Rocky’s background song still plays.
In Elsa and Anna’s teen years, and Rocky’s song getting to the chorus part, the wise troll decided to use Anna as part of Elsa’s practice after he got permission by the king and queen. The wise troll asks Elsa and Anna to play with each other, and asks Anna to go fast. True that Elsa wanted Anna to take it steady, but this is another task that she must handle. So, Elsa uses her wintry magic creating snow pillars for Anna to jump on. The trolls gaze with delight at the two sisters having fun as part of Elsa’s practice. When Anna gets to the part where she plays too fast, Elsa this time must go with it and try to improvise her icy power with safety measure. Instead of creating more ice pillars, she created gigantic snow slides for Anna to slide on. In fact, Elsa even remembered her imagination of creating snow slides when she was young before she became a teen. When Anna made it safely to the ground, the trolls applaud and cheered for Elsa.
The wise troll summons Kristoff, a mountain man who was raised by trolls and sells ice for a living, to bring forth his blocks of ice as part of Elsa’s next training. Sven, Kristoff’s pet reindeer, brings a sleigh full of ice blocks, and Kristoff sets each of the ice blocks at the open for Elsa’s training. She must learn to stack the ice blocks steady and easy. Her next task to feel relax when stacking ice blocks. Elsa uses her icy magic to carry ice blocks from underneath, and stack them to the side. Suddenly, Elsa begins to fear about throwing ice blocks toward people, including Anna, Kristoff, Sven, the wise troll, and the trolls.
The wise troll says to Elsa, “Remember to remain calm. Remember to relax. Think positive, don’t think negative”
Elsa thinks happy thoughts while the ice blocks levitate from the ground. She gently stacks the ice blocks till they’re two columns. Anna, Kristoff, and the trolls applaud to her. The wise troll became very pleased as Rocky’s song still plays in the background.
In Elsa and Anna’s adult years, and Rocky’s song still playing in the background, Elsa’s next training is creativity using her ice magic. Elsa may have used it for fun with Anna creating snow pillars, snow hills, and snow slides; but now she must learn to cast her icy powers around her surroundings for special purposes than just have fun. She could use it for good deeds such as helping Kristoff with his ice business, put out fire, or anything that can be good. Elsa uses her icy magic to create something. However, she fears that she would create something for evil. As a result, she creates a ferocious snowman known as the abominable Marshmallow, with sharp icicle fingers of its hands, icicle spikes upon its back, and icicle fangs that roar like a lion. Anna, Kristoff, Sven, and the trolls take cover to hide themselves from the hideous creature.
The wise troll says to Elsa, “Remember to control your fear. Try to think of something nice to create.”
And Elsa did. She remembered the time she made a snowman named Olaf for Anna. She uses her icy magic to disintegrate Marshmallow, and create a living snowman named Olaf. When Olaf was made, the eyes of the snowman blinks, and he said, “Hi everybody, I’m Olaf, and I love warm hugs.”
Anna asks Kristoff for a carrot, and he gives the carrot to her. She places the carrot on Olaf’s face for his nose. Olaf loves the carrot for his nose, and never felt happier. Elsa became happy for her creation.
The trolls applaud to Elsa’s achievement and the wise troll smiles.
Meanwhile as Rocky’s song takes a break for a moment, the king and queen decided to sail over other countries for special meetings. They bid their daughters Elsa and Anna goodbye, and set sail. Unfortunately, they got hit by a storm, and became lost at sea. The kingdom of Arendelle considered the king and queen dead. A funeral is held outside of Arendelle. Two pillars each with the king and queen’s name on it to express remembrance. Everyone, even Elsa and Anna, dressed in black. Of course, Elsa weeps loudly on the ground like Rocky weeping on Ben in “Rocky III.” Anna and Olaf comfort her while Kristoff, Sven, and the people bowed their heads to express sorrow and pity.
Three months later and Rocky’s song resumes, Elsa was about to be crowned queen. Before she does, the wise troll comes forth to Arendelle to give Elsa her last training, and it is the most difficult training for her to face. In Arendelle, the people are decorating to prepare for the coronation to celebrate Elsa’s place as queen. People are invited to it, including the Duke of Weselton, whose purpose is to exploit Arendelle’s riches through trade, and Prince Hans of the Southern Isles.
In the courtyard of Arendelle, the wise troll asks Elsa and Anna to bring volunteers of Arendelle to prepare for Elsa’s last task. The people, even servants, of Arendelle volunteer.
The wise troll asks them, “I want all of you to call Elsa a monster.”
One of the servants said in shock, “But wouldn’t that be high treason? She’s going to be crowned queen.”
The wise troll answers to the people, “She must learn to control her fear if she wants to be crowned queen. Otherwise, she would curse your land by creating eternal winter, and freeze your hearts out till you’re all frozen and dead.”
The people agreed with the wise troll’s point, and the servant said to Elsa feeling sorry, “Forgive me my lady.”
The people call Elsa a monster.
The wise troll asks the people, “Louder, so that she would fear it and learn to control it.”
Anna, Kristoff, Sven, and Olaf refused to say it since Anna is her sister. Anna couldn’t bare people calling Elsa a monster, and embraces Kristoff for comfort. Olaf embraces Sven, for he too couldn’t bare it.
Elsa begins to feel the pressure from people calling her a monster. She begins to feel the fear inside her veins and even her heart. As the people grew louder, it makes it worse for her.
The Duke of Weselton heard people shouting at Elsa, and said feeling curious and a bit joyful, “Say, is this some kind of shouting contest? Count me in!”
He too joins in the crowd, and shouts monster, but not at Elsa.
He turned to his two henchmen, and said, “Well don’t just stand there, join me.”
His two henchmen joined the shouting chant.
When Prince Hans saw the outcome, he decided to stop the outcome since he finds people calling Elsa a monster a crime for slander. But one of the guards stops him, and says to him that it was part of Elsa’s training.
Elsa’s wintry power starts to sprinkle in the air creating a cold air expressing her fear. She begs the people for mercy, but they kept on shouting. Elsa begins to loose control as the cold air expands rapidly. And then all of the sudden, she spreads her icy beams all around her in full power.
Kristoff, Olaf, Sven, the Duke of Weselton, Prince Hans, and the servants and people of Arendelle duck to save their lives, but Anna was too late. Due to not baring people calling her sister a monster, she became a bit sad and couldn’t control her emotion. She takes the hit at her heart, collapses to the ground, her hair turns completely white, and her skin getting frosty. Elsa became shocked to see her own sister struck by her. Once it completes the process within seconds, it freezes Anna’s entire body, and she dies in a frozen body.
The people of Arendelle remain silent, and saw poor Anna froze to death.
Elsa cries out to her sister, “Anna!” She turns to the wise troll feeling shocked and sad.
The wise troll says to her, “Remember what I said about love.”
Elsa argues at the wise troll feeling angry, “Love? Your training to help me learn to control my fear with love made me kill my only sister by accident! And now she’s dead because of your training! I’m through with your training! I hate you!”
Elsa rushes to her only sister, and weeps upon her for her loss.
The people in Arendelle pay pity for Anna’s death.
Suddenly, something magical happen. Anna begins to thaw. The people in Arendelle begin to gaze with astonishment. As Anna thaws from her frozen heart, she comes back to life and says to Elsa, “Elsa?”
Elsa becomes surprised and relieved to see her little sister back. Elsa and Anna got up from the ground and embrace each other.
Anna says, “I knew you could do it.”
The wise troll says to Elsa, “You did not let me finish.”
Elsa and Anna give the wise troll their attention. The people in Arendelle did the same.
The wise troll explains. “An act of true love will warm a frozen heart.”
Elsa comes to the wise troll feeling embarrassed, and said, “I’m sorry for what I’ve said before. I was scared to lose my only sister during that task that I had to go through.”
The wise troll replied, “It’s alright, I get that from a lot of people who had a hard time with their final task. But remember what I’ve told you about fear that would be your enemy. Never let fear get to you. Always embrace love to overcome fear. Now that you’re fully trained, you’ve learned to overcome fear with love. You’ve done very well Elsa, or should I say,” the wise troll bows to her, “Queen Elsa of Arendelle.”
The people in Arendelle cheered for Elsa, and the trolls came to cheer with them as well.
Anna rushes to Elsa, and they both embrace each other while Rocky’s song still plays in the background.
In the church as Rocky’s song takes a break, the coronation begins. Elsa steps forth at the podium of the church, and bows her head as the priest places the crown upon her head. Anna stands beside her to see her crowned, and waves hello to Prince Hans. Prince Hans, in the seat with other people, waves back. After the crowning, she raises up with no fear whatsoever. She holds the two treasures as part of the ritual, and the priest recites the tradition to crown Elsa as queen. After that, the people in the church of Arendelle; including Kristoff, Olaf, Sven, and the Duke of Weselton; cheer for Elsa. Elsa puts the two treasures back upon the pillow, and rushes out the church feeling excited after she learned to overcome fear with love, and Rocky’s song resumes.
Elsa rushes outside of Arendelle as Rocky’s song gets to the part where the chorus sings the climax. People admire her achievement, and decided to chant her name to give her cheer. The people then follow her, including the trolls, even Anna. She rushes to the mountain where she creates an ice palace to express her victory. The people and trolls stop and gaze at her creation while chanting her name with joy. After the completion of her ice palace, she takes off her crown, and throws it at the people to see if they can catch it. The little girl in the audience catches her crown. After that, she gives her outfit a new look, making her clothes made of ice particles with a frosty cape to go with her fashion. She comes to the balcony of her ice palace to show herself to the people, and they cheer loudly at her. Anna came inside her ice palace, Elsa and Anna grab each others hands, and start to jump with excitement till they freeze in the air as Rocky’s song concludes.
At night in the throne room of Arendelle, Anna and Prince Hans agreed to marry each other, and asked Elsa for their blessing. But Elsa was not concerned with Anna’s marriage to Prince Hans.
Elsa says to Anna feeling uncertain, “You can’t marry a man you’ve just met than giving more time for yourself and his.”
Anna argues, “You can if it’s true love.”
Elsa argues back, “If you want to know about true love, why not ask the wise troll? I bet he knows more about true love than you.”
“But I do know true love. I learned that it’s love at first sight. All you know is love overcomes fear.”
“You ask for my blessing, and I said no.”
Prince Hans says to Elsa, “Excuse me your majesty, but may I just say…”
Elsa replies to him with her hand in front of him, “No, you may not.” She lowers her hand. “I think it’s best for you to give more time for yourself to know my sister before you can even ask her to marry you.” She shouts to the people in Arendelle with her gloves off. “Who’s up for ice skating?!”
Elsa casts her icy magic in the throne room, turning the whole room into a wintry wonderland with the ground turn into ice, a few snow pillars for children to play snowball, snow slides to slide, and frozen water fountains outside of the castle to express her art. The people admire her magic, and start to have fun.
Rapunzel, who came to her coronation, asks Eugene with excitement, “Come on Eugene, let’s skate! This is so much fun!”
Eugene feels nervous, “Uh Rapunzel, there’s something I forgot to tell you. I don’t know how to skate.”
Anna, feeling offended by her sister’s rejection, says to her feeling mad, “Well since the wise troll gave you training, maybe he can give me and Hans a blessing instead of you! Then we’ll see who knows about true love!” She faces at Prince Hans. “Come on Hans, we’re going to see the trolls! Let these love birds have their fun!”
Anna hooks Prince Hans swiftly and storms out of the castle to see the wise troll. Prince Hans tries to keep up with her pace.
Elsa says to Anna, even though she may not know what she says, with her eyes dim a bit and a little grin, “Suuuure you would.” She sees Rapunzel, and says with delight, “Hey girlfriend!”
Anna and Prince Hans made it to the trolls’ place. Anna asks the wise troll to give her and Prince Hans their blessing for their marriage.
The wise troll comes forth, and says to them, “I’m sorry Anna, but you can’t marry a man who has no heart for you.”
Prince Hans becomes suspicious about the trolls.
Anna becomes sad and asks, “Why not?”
The wise troll answers, “Do you really want to love a man who would break your heart by taking control of your kingdom and leave you and your sister dead? In fact, didn’t your parents ever told you about strangers? I’ve read Prince Hans’s heart, and he has a dark purpose against you and your sister.”
Prince Hans becomes mad after the wise troll knew his dark plan.
Anna becomes shocked. “What?!”
The wise troll continues to explain. “If you let Hans marry you, he would do whatever he can to put your sister out of the way, and even you to take control of your kingdom. He cares nothing for your but himself. He has a dark heart for his own cruelty. I would respect your sister’s wish if I were you.”
Prince Hans takes his sword out to kill Anna since the wise troll knew his dark secret.
The wise troll shouts at Anna noticing Prince Hans ready to strike. “Behind you!”
Anna spun and gasp in horror. Suddenly, someone grasps Prince Hans’s hand behind him. It was Kristoff, along with Olaf and Sven. As Kristoff grasps Prince Hans’s hand, he gave him a punch in the face which made him unconscious. Anna was relieved to be saved.
Anna comes to Kristoff and embraces him with relief. “Kristoff, you saved my life.” They let go each other, and she asks, “But what are you doing here.”
Kristoff explains, “I’m here to see my friends, the love experts, to see how they’re doing since they took me in and raised me.”
“You mean the trolls.”
“Of course. I see that you’ve learned a valuable lesson about true love.”
She looks down feeling embarrassed. “Yes, I guess so.”
The wise troll says to Anna, “Don’t pity on yourself. You just didn’t know about true love. If you want, I can teach you about it.”
Anna replied, “It’s okay. I think I get the idea, but I’ll keep in touch.” She turns and smiles at Kristoff.
Kristoff smiles back, and says, “Come on, I’ll take you home.”
Olaf says to Sven with excitement, “There’s true love right there!”
Prince Hans wakes up from his unconsciousness. Kristoff was about to give Prince Hans another punch, but Anna stops him and takes over.
Prince Hans tries to reason with her, “Anna, I can explain.”
Anna says to him with her eyes a bit dim in disgust, “The only person with a frozen heart around here is you.” She turns away from him, and swiftly punches him in the face. Prince Hans remains unconscious again, and the trolls cheer for her knock out against him. Kristoff became very impressed with her spunk.
When Anna, Kristoff, Olaf, and Sven return to Arendelle, she explained everything to Elsa about what happened at the trolls’ place. Elsa became shocked, and sends her guards to bring Prince Hans to the dungeon of Arendelle, and have him return to his twelve brothers tomorrow morning based on his terrible behavior.
Anna says to Elsa with her head down feeling embarrassed, “I’m sorry that I doubted you. I guess I should’ve known what true love really means.”
Elsa replies, “It’s okay. There’s no need to pity on yourself. In fact, you’re lucky that Kristoff saved your life; otherwise I would lose you completely.”
Anna raises her head up. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“You know what Elsa?” She turns to Kristoff with delight. “He could be your true love for you since he was raised by the trolls after my training with the wise troll.”
Kristoff points his hands at both Elsa and Anna. “Whoa-ho-ho! Let’s not get so far ahead now.” He lays his hands down. “I’m just an ice harvester. I sell ice for a living.”
Anna replies to Kristoff, “Maybe I can help.”
Kristoff says to Anna, “I don’t know.”
“Well, you did save my life from that selfish prince.”
“Well, I could use another sleigh to deliver more ice.”
“I’ll get you another sleigh. After all, I am the princess of Arendelle.”
“Would you really?”
“Of course.”
“I could kiss you, but may we…or maybe…or…” Kristoff mumbles. “Wait, what?”
Anna comes close to Kristoff, and kisses him in the cheek, and says with delight, “We may.” Anna and Kristoff kiss each other in the lips.
As for Olaf, Elsa provided him a snow flurry, so that he can enjoy summer.
And so, Elsa learned to control her fear with love, and Anna learned that in order to find true love is to find a good heart and never get corrupted by a dark heart. And so Elsa, Anna, and the people in Arendelle lived happily ever after.
As for Wandering Oaken’s Trading Post and Sauna, Oaken shifted his location from the open surrounded by trees in the forest to Arendelle for better business. And as for the wolves, they howl at the moon without care.
As for the Duke of Weselton, he got rejected by Elsa since she had no satisfaction with his trading business. How did he know?
One of her servants told him the message, and said, “Arendelle will henceforth no longer be in the trading business with Weasel-ton.”
When the Duke, heard that saying, he responds feeling a bit discouraged, “It’s Weselton!” Again, Elsa, Anna, and the rest of the people in Arendelle lived happily ever after.
BONUS
